lola guerrero

50-something empty-nest-search-for-God-and-happiness with more than a dash of humor

Let’s talk about men-O-pause, shall we?P.1

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My long time friend Cecilia and I played ping pong text the other day. She lives in the coldest part of the country, Alaska, with her lawyer husband Sam and five-year-old son Riley. Every time I touch base with her, she is drafting a novel, chopping wood, or chasing her kid around.

She invites me all the time to visit, though I have no desire to go. It seems too blistery cold way yonder. This is what is depicted in movies that I watch on Net Flix. Big burly men with dark goggles, wearing heavy coats with fur vests. Never have I seen a woman with a tank top and white linen shorts on a dog sleigh traveling over ice, snow, and steep terrain.

Our texts:

“Last Saturday was horrible, horrible. I had a perfect snowstorm- menopause, fatigue, frustrated–cried half the day inside my master bedroom walk-in closet. I holed up.”

Wonder if she had the light on?

“Really, inside your closet? Did you have food? Food is a cure-all.”

“No food.”

“Before your isolation, you could have brought a glass of your favorite Rose’, celery, hummus, and MM’s. I know, I know, it’s not like these situations are premeditated.

“It’s pitch dark in my closet. Then, I hear Sam call my name, and I yell

‘in here.’ Would you believe he comes in and joins me.”

She didn’t have the light on.

“He joined you in the closet? I told you, I was right all along, you hit the MEGA million lottery ticket with him.”

“Yes, I know. We talked things out, and I most certainly will call my doctor. It is the early stage of menopause.”

“That is syrupy sweet. I’m so jealous in a friendly fashion. Your hubby joined you, and you talked things out, and all went well in the dark.”

Since I am close to being done with men-on-pause and she is a long time friend, I decided to giver her some ideas to get through this change of life thing.

The Essentials:

*estrogen and testosterone compound creams  *vitamins  *exercise (which you get a lot of that from wood chopping and chasing Riley around *take naps

AND

* When it comes to sex, this is a slippery slope. Some women sex continues to be a pleasurable activity, cheerios to them, and others like me, there is a giant STOP sign between our legs.

Not to lose hope, one remedy is tequila.

 

 

Author: lolaguerrero

50 something, mother of two, married, grandson named Napoleon. Love to go to the gym, watch films, act, write, jog, walk 10 miles with my husband, wine and travel. I"m a double tall, NF latte with half a pump of mocha with whip cream.

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