lola guerrero

50-something empty-nest-search-for-God-and-happiness with more than a dash of humor

Buh-Bye Now

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When do you know when you had enough?
When do you say “Buh-bye now” to someone who is
not pleasant to be with?

Eunice is a relative of mine.

Sunday Ol’ Wise One and I drive up to
her favorite casino in the middle of
the Pacific Northwest where the roadsides are
dense with fall-colored trees. We have
done this drive for the last 28 years. Suffice to say,
before the journey I say to myself “Please, God, help me today” prayer.

Eunice loves celebrating her birthday inside Casino Royale where
it is dark , smelly, and filled with chain smokers. Just where
you want to spend your bright sunny Sunday.

I go along for this ride and this birthday lunch
out of respect for Ol’ Wise One.

When lunch is over and we are walking to her car,
I hug Eunice to say goodbye and she doesn’t hug back.
It is as if I have some incurable virus. And she doesn’t care to
say thank you for for the gift, the lunch, and our time to make the three-hour drive
to meet her for her birthday.

Eunice has always been this way. Why expect anything different?
I keep hoping she will change her ways. But, this particular
day something in me awakens. I finally realize it is me
who needs to change. I have had enough of her rudeness and ungrateful
ways.

Eunice is now in her own car and we walk to ours. I am deep in thought.
Suddenly, I tell myself,“This is where it stops. This is where I draw the line.”
I have clarity. I will not be deterred in any way.

I have been patient for 28 years. Now it is time to say: Buh-bye now.
No more birthday lunches with Eunice for me.

When we begin to honor who we are . . . we make room for the
universe to bless us with something better that is more meaningful and enjoyable.
Our choice honors and symbolizes our appreciation for our precious time left on this planet.

Dear God,
I release this situation to you.
You blessed me with wisdom and guidance to
do the right thing for 28 years. I have shown up, honored and respected this relative.
I will now step aside.

Amen. Lola

Author: lolaguerrero

50 something, mother of two, married, grandson named Napoleon. Love to go to the gym, watch films, act, write, jog, walk 10 miles with my husband, wine and travel. I"m a double tall, NF latte with half a pump of mocha with whip cream.

2 thoughts on “Buh-Bye Now

  1. Such a tough situation. I’ve been there. Though mine was a clinging, manipulative type. Not good for me and not good for her (given my refusal to cling back, etc.). I had to let her go. Kudos to you! God will indeed fill this space with something new.

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  2. I’m taking your advice….let it go. If the other person cannot change, then I will try to change my behavior, attitude, reaction. Then I will have peace in myself. I have to learn to be nice, kind, compassionate, and say words that God wants to hear. I’ll try to remember for God to pray for the other person because it’s not always my fault….

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