lola guerrero

50-something empty-nest-search-for-God-and-happiness with more than a dash of humor


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You Are Unstoppable, Part 1

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May I find meaningful work and meaningful
activity in my life.
I desire to wake up each morning and feel
that I am used on behalf of something
glorious.        by M. Williamson

Who is in your S3SS?

S3SS stands for Super 3 Support System.

Having a super support system
was a reoccurring theme during
my cousin’s graduation ceremony.

In the early morning, I had
a throbbing behind-the-eyes migraine.

“Today is not the day to have anything wrong with me,” I told myself while I tossed and turned in bed.
“Man, I have to show up.
Plus, there’s food and wine afterwards. Can’t miss that.”

I managed to soothe my migraine and
I showed up.

It was an inspiring and motivating day. About 300 grads
completed their degrees in their chosen field. Each one had a moving story to share, but we couldn’t hear all 300 stories. We would have been there until midnight. Two candidates were selected to share how they made it.

LEAH HANSEN worked for the Department of Corrections for 25 years.
In order for her to move forward in her career, she had to get
her Bachelor’s degree. She had all sorts of excuses to not do it:

I’m a single mom. I work full time. Who will
care for my son if I’m doing homework? How can I afford
college? All these excuses were in the way and would not let her move from point
A to point B. But, she had a support system to help her.

Leah’s super three support system included her mom, stepdad,
and best friend and they told her:
“If you set your mind on doing something good–you can do the impossible.”
With this in mind she applied to college, got in, and pursued her degree.

With focus, determination, and
help from her family she now has a degree in criminal justice.

Dang! When I heard that I reached for a tissue.

We make excuses everyday, don’t we?

**********PART 2 tomorrow


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20/20

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I must be a popular person to be with and loved. Of course, ZEN vibes
ooze out of my skin throughout  the day. Who wouldn’t want to be
with me?

Two invitations came to me  this week: one from Ol’  Wise One and the
other was from my BF.

Ole’ Wise One asked me to go to a high school graduation three hours away. It was for Jenna, his late best friend’s daughter. Getting there means driving to the ferry dock,
getting on the ferry, and then driving another two hours. Really.
Is that how I want to spend my precious Friday?

My BF invited me to go to the beach with her in July for the weekend with another girlfriend.  “Wow!” I thought. “Walking the beach with
two ladies I’m fond of sounds fantastic and I know at night there will be dinners with
serious talks about our husbands, grandkids, and world events. We will figure out what ISIS is all about and formulate ways to handle all the scary things on the news.
How can I refuse?

But, I began to ponder why I didn’t jump with  excitement. Is something wrong with me?
“NO, I’m being who I am,”  I told myself.
As I thought more about the situation, I became aware what I wanted to do.

It’s amazing to be over 50. I know how much I know what I want NOW. I know myself more  than ever. The layers of what I don’t want are peeling away faster and faster. Could it be that I’m AWAKE to the fact that I’m not  getting any younger. I know I have low estrogen.
And I know I’m getting closer to my grave.

As these layers peel away, I’m getting  closer to my soul,
the core of who I am–my true beautiful self.

With clarity, I know what I didn’t want. I didn’t want to
be in the car driving to an event that I could care less about.

How awful it would be for me to be with my husband with
this bitchy attitude.  The very truth was that was not how I wanted to
spend my day.

Going to the beach was not what I wanted to do for  one weekend
during the summer. I know there will come a time that I will see both of these ladies.
Just not this July.

By  saying “yes” to the two invites, my mind and body
would go through a  spin and rinse cycle of “Why did I say  yes? I don’t want to go,
but if I don’t go they will get mad or they will think I’m selfish.”

With my  20/20 vision and ability to know how I would react be in the future, I knew what I wanted and realized it before I said “yes” to something that I really wanted to say “no” to.

My days  and weeks are about my husband, making dinners, my mom,  my relatives, and my part-time job. When I do have the time to do nothing and have a moment to myself,  I feel like the luckiest woman on earth. I’m so grateful to have timeout. Having timeout with myself energizes me.
I’m centered. No one needs me!!! I love it.

I can do things like catch up on reading other blog sites,
take in a movie, get some writing done on paper–all sorts of
soul-caring stuff that feeds my soul.

Perhaps I’m making up time for all the yesses I said
back in my 30s and 40s.

My BF said to me “That’s OK if you don’t want to go. You are clear and
that is all that matters.” She is so supportive, caring, and spunky. That’s
why we are BFs .

This much I do know: I’m blessed and I thank God for all the great people in my life.

And to all the young women bloggers  out there, if you are reading this,
learn to say NO. It’s OK.

Dear God,
All week long, I give so much  to others.
And I know I’m on this planet  to work, have relationships,
to care for my mother, and to be a helpmate to my partner.

Thank you for giving me the clarity to know caring
for myself is just as important as giving to others.

Amen.

Lola


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Big Fat Juicy Bacon Cheeseburger

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Today . . . the rhythm of the universe
can’t be ignored. The sky is a pretty blue and the sun is out and
everyone seems to be in a happy mood.

I notice people are friendlier during sunny days in the Pacific Northwest.  Everyone I pass by
is wearing pretty summer dresses,  summer T-shirts, shorts, and sandals.
I ruminate over the words in Psalms 118:24.
This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad.
.
I should be rejoicing, singing, and skippin’ to my Starbucks office, but nooo. Not me. Not today.
I feel depleted.
I have no confidence in my  writing; my right side of the brain is not working.
What holds my interest more is wrapping my fingers around
a big fat juicy double cheeseburger with bacon.

What on earth is going on with my brain?

I am reminded of my BF saying something to me the other day about focusing on what is missing in her life, particularly in her marriage, and it made her sad.
Then she caught herself shifting her thoughts. She began to focus on what is working in her marriage. She felt better.

So, the big fat burger will just have to wait for now.

Let me try that exercise. Let me make a list of the
Top 6 things that are working in my life.
Perhaps I will feel better, too.

1. I will get to babysit my grandson, Napoleon, here in Seattle in two months. His parents are going off to a resort for some R&R. I CANNOT WAIT.
Get this . . . my neighbor has a car seat and a playpen for me to use! It’s all meant to be.

2. My nephew and his finance are tying the knot this fall. I’m so excited for them, plus I have a reason to go buy a new dress. Cuz, I never have anything to wear don’t cha know!

3. I GET TO speak at a retreat in two weeks.
Give me a microphone and an audience and I’m
in my ZONE.

4. Ol’ Wise One and I go for walks. Praise God, we have pain-free legs and hips to cover seven miles of beach and parks close to our condo.

5. I get to keep my own work hours so I’m able to
do one of my favorite things in life–go to the gym for an hour and sweat like a pig.
I love it.

6. This Friday I GET TO spend some time
all by myself to do anything I want.
I will not run errands, look over rental agreements,
cook or clean. Just thinking about this time on my hands makes me feel
energetic and giddy.

Now! I’m I’m in rhythm with the universe.
Now, it is time for my Big Fat Juicy Bacon Cheeseburger washed down with a diet Pepsi.

Share with me what you do to get your
brain and body in rhythm with the universe.

Dear God,
I have so much great stuff.
And things are working out in my life.
At times I can’t see. Forgive me for being blind.

Help us begin each day with
good thoughts about You and the beauty that surrounds us.

Thank you.
Amen.