lola guerrero

50-something empty-nest-search-for-God-and-happiness with more than a dash of humor

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Waiting . . .




Is it hard for you to be still?
Still enough to take a few minutes each day to quiet the mind
and hear what the God of the universe has to say
and learn the direction he desires for us to go?
Most days I walk ahead of God
and don’t take that few minutes needed to
pause and allow God to reveal his wisdom.

I have the hardest time doing that — listening and waiting.
But when I commit
to the moment to be still  — I receive
an array of wonderful Aha! thoughts.
Imagine that.

Just the other day, I was walking to
my Starbucks office with my head down and
thinking about why “my life” is like it is.
I wasn’t coming from a place of being
ungratefulness or miserable  — I was checking in with myself, coming from a place of awareness.

Talking to myself, I said,
“Maybe the reason why I’m in this valley and the
valley so low is that God is still creating and shaping all the
missing puzzles pieces that belong and perfectly fit
in my life.

Here are the things I have been waiting on:
* ‘Ole Wise One and I have been searching for
the perfect 2,500-sq.ft. three-bedroom home.
It’s probably being painted and staged right
this minute.
So I will have to wait.

* My son, Ralph, to be hired by this well-known agency in New York.
My sense is that before he gets the position
he will have to wait on tables a little while longer.
Hmmm . . . I guess that means my son will be a waiting waiter.

* That exciting career for myself that I have been
praying for and visualizing in lotus position when I meditate.
Again, perhaps all the things I have been
doing lately like writing, blogging,
having a chance to speak at this
one retreat, and attending bible study are
shaping me for what is to come.

Not only do we have to wait for our careers to take
off and the home of our dreams to show up . . .

. . .  we wait for smaller things like the light to turn green at an intersection
or we patiently wait in a long line for our
triple tall non-fat caramel macchiato with a light drizzle
of sweetness.

This I know —
If we can wait for our favorite smiley barista to
concoct that perfect macchiato, I think we can wait on
God for a few minutes each day. We can take the time to pray for his  direction and
allow him to create, shape, and connect all the missing
pieces in our lives.

Let’s pray.

Dear God,

Today, take me to a place in my
heart, thoughts, and body to patiently wait
for your timing and all that you have for me.
I know the best is coming.
Thank you for the confetti of blessings that you shower upon me.



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My BF Mish and I had an uplifting phone conversation this morning.
I shared about our 12 days in Manhattan — how Ol’ Wise One and I had a relaxing time seeing our son, Ralph. We spent time  with him by strolling through Central Park,
attending three plays, and visiting the top of The Empire State Building.

In the middle of our trip, we bought  tickets  to a Yankees game in the Bronx. After the game, we hailed a cab back to our hotel. An intense conversation ensued with our taxi driver  who we thought understood the address we gave him. Apparently not, he thought we said Harlem. Really. Do we look like we have things to do in Harlem?

“We had a fantastic time doing tourist stuff. The only thing we didn’t do was ride the scenic tour bus, and I prayed before we left that God would open our hearts and to enjoy each others’ company. My prayers were answered.”

Mish shared what was going on in her life while I was on vacation.
“I have another client,” she announced.
I gasped. “No kidding? I was praying the other day that God would put women in your life to counsel.”
“Thank you for that. Yes . . . this one woman called me and said she wanted to know more about the book The Desire Map and how to apply it in her life.”

A little background about Mish. In the past, she has looked for ways to reach out to women who are survivors of abuse. She is a survivor, too. The Desire Map: A guide to creating goals with soul
landed on her lap and she began to apply the principles in her life.

This book spoke to her. It has given her balance, awareness, authenticity, and energy to go after what she desires. In addition to one-on-one counseling, she leads retreats at
her home that teach women how to meditate and develop goals that make them feel good. She is a guide who helps people unleash desires and goals that have been hiding out in their hearts.

“My new name is Dynamic Badass,” she said. We both laughed.

After the call  with Dynamic Badass, I thought why not call my mother? I’m already on the phone.  I’m sure she would love to hear my voice.

“Hi Mother. How are you? Did my brothers take care of you?”
“Ohh, a miracle,” she says.

Oh nice, Mother has good news.

“You know, I pray to God one night. I say, “Oh Lord, please tell my son, Ed, to call me. I want to go to out, to casino. I have no driver. Lola is in New York. Then, next day your brother, Ed, call me. Oh my God, Tank you, Lord. I say.”

I can imagine my mother the night before fervently praying . . . twirling her rosary beads asking God to produce his next miracle — Ed picking up the phone to call our mother.

After talking to the two most important women in my life, I’m in awe of how God works in our lives.

My son, Ralph, is growing and maturing. He is finding his way in and out of Manhattan. I saw him in action with our New York cab driver who spoke  no English.
I was impressed, he takes no sh– from these guys! Right on! I say.
I keep telling myself, if my baby can make it in New York. He can make it anywhere. New York is schooling him at moment. But, he seems to be a fast learner.

I thank God each day for giving me the strength to let him go and be the man God wants him to be.

With respect to Dynamic Badass and my mother, I have never met individuals more generous
than these two ladies. Dynamic Badass is known for giving free counseling and my mother is known for her own version of Meals on Wheels.
I know that it is because of their giving spirits that God keeps blessing them with goodness in their lives. This I know — God blesses you as you bless others!

Dear God,
Thank you so much for listening to our prayers.
And for caring for us.

Continue to transform our minds each day. May we put our lives and concerns in your hands first knowing that you have the best outcome in store for us.

Amen, Lola

P.S For information on The Desire Map retreats/ counseling  email Mish at

Pictures from NY



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How Do You Show Your Love



How do you show your love?

Do you cook a favorite dish to bring or share?
Do you surprise a special person in your life with their favorite wine?
Do you go pick up a friend and treat them to lunch?

Once a week, I pick up my mother and take her to
the bank or we go have a latte at Starbucks.
Then, I take her  to her favorite Asian market. For some reason
we always end up at the Asian market. It’s a pattern.
But, sometimes we switch it up. Whooppee!!!
We go the market first and THEN have a latte.

The Asian market is located on a corner with
tight parking  and it is always full. I hate it! I’m a snob. I like my cars to be
shiny, clean, and ding free. Just sayin’.

When we enter the store, Mother goes ahead while I
grab a Barbie doll-size  cart. My job is to  follow her and listen.

“Oh,  mangoes. Bery good . . . last week I buy one box,
bery sweet. Today, I get two box. I give to my kids.”

Oh, Holy Spirit, help me. My mother is now promoting mangoes.

Like their parking lot, the aisles in the Asian market drive me nuts.
When others want to pass me, I have to stand in place and not move so they
can zig-zag their own Barbie doll-sized cart past me.

It’s insane. Can’t the owners just make the aisles wider? Guess not.

“I cook for sister-in- law. She tells me she like fish so I cook.”

“Right on, Mother.”

“We go next week and deliver fish.”

I nod.

This can’t be my life. It is all a dream.

“Did you get everything you want at the store?”

“Tank you Lord. I remember soy sauce.
Almost forget.  You know,  I feel happy when I cook and give.”
She continues to talk to me as I merge onto the freeway.

After I dropped off my mother, I realized that what she said made sense.
She demonstrates her love by making favorite dishes for her loved ones.  Cooking tasty dishes is her way of being creative, and let me tell you—the lady CAN COOK.  There are dishes that I will eat every five years ONLY if my mother has prepared them. One is liver. Gross, you say. Well, like I said, every five years I’ll eat it and my mother has to be the chef—and there have to be lots of onions.

Try it, you just might like it.

After being with  my mother, I ended up asking myself how do I show my love?

Here is my list:
*To my husband, sometimes during our walks and when the mood strikes, I hold his hand and say “love you.”
*I show my love to my friends by buying their favorite wine and drinking it with them.  Or I text them to ask about their day.
* I show love to my boys by telling them I’m proud of them and by listening to what they have to say.
*I show my love to my mother by setting aside one day each week to spend time with her and help her with her errands like going to the Asian market.

What does your list look like?

Dear God,
Thank you for showing me how my mother shows her love to others.
I always learn something from her even if I don’t want to.

Situations like these teach us to be better  human beings,
taking us away from focusing only on ourselves and helping us to put our energy into showing our love for others.